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Not By the Hair of My Chinny Chin Chin!

May 17, 2009

I swear that if God descended from Heaven or if a genie came out of a bottle, whatever, and I was granted one wish, I would ask that women have no hair below the eye lash. Okay, so maybe some in the little whoo ha ha area (insert name here, if you’d like), but not near as much as we’re given.

I’m monitoring a new scar on my chin, and honestly, I’ve been looking at this thing daily. Today I was in the bathroom doing my daily check when BAM, there it was, a fucking chin hair. Now it’s not that this hair grows even close to the same slow pace that my head hair grows. No, it’s like on steroids. Every day I’m looking, nothing, nothing, nothing, then suddenly it’s like a 12 inch hair sprouting out. I’ve learned to always keep a tweezers in my car because it’s in the broad daylight looking in the review mirror, that I always find the worst of them.

I was having drinks with a friend the other day. She took her first drink, and it was super strong. I pretty much spit my drink out when she said ‘whoa, that will put some hair on your chest’. And as she looked down continued with ‘oh, wait it already did.’

I swear it’s the poison of every woman. We pay good money to have it lasered off. We endure insane amounts of pain to have it waxed off, and as we get older, it seems to get worse. Plus it just seems almost un-managable. It comes from no where, and grows at rates so quickly, it’s unimaginable to the human brain.

What I don’t get either, are the woman who don’t take care of the problem. Okay, so a light stache, we’ll let that one slide. But when there’s the mole with like 10 hairs coming out of it, or even the bearded lady that takes your toll money at the airport, there needs to be some serious waxing or something going on. Don’t tell me it’s a cost issue either because Nair is not that expensive, and tweezers, although painful, are available at $.99 a pop.

So I wish we never, ever had to deal with chin, nipple, lip, bikini line, you name it, hair of any kind. That’s what men are for, but unfortunately God or Genies aren’t going to be granting me wishes, or consulting with me any time soon. For now I have to stick with hourly monitoring because over a two hour span that little sucker can go about 2-3 inches!

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One Comment leave one →
  1. Julianne permalink
    May 17, 2009 2:36 pm

    This post is so funny! I am such a lucky Mom to have such a brilliant daughter! I taught you well, young lady!

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