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April 27, 2009

After hearing a song for the first time, I made my mamarazzi sit and listen to it with me. At which point I promptly broke down in tears as I lay there listening to the lyrics. She looked up with me, and with the sweetest, most concerned expression, and asked:

“Do you think you miss him because he was the last person that truly loved you in a relationship, for all that you were, and all that you are, no questions asked?”

And then it hit me.

Yes.

It’s not him I miss, but what we had.

And in that exact moment I realized that there will be someone, someday, who will love for me, for all that I am, and all that I will be, no questions asked. Someday. Until then, I’m allowed to listen to this song, and go through the necessary steps of healing my heart that has been forever changed by a man.***

“Close”

It’s just another simple voice mail message
I’ll pick you up and we’ll do dinner by the fire
And we’ll just watch it snow
It’s from a year ago
Baby I love you and I can’t wait to see you tonight
I’ve been thinking ’bout you all day long
She pushes nine to save
She still can’t erase

Cause it makes her feel close
Makes her smile it’s like he’s with her almost
Till the tears take over she’s still in hell
But she tells herself she’s ready to let him go
Cause that makes her feel close

It’s just a worn out Notre Dame t-shirt
She’s gotten mad and tried to throw
That thing away at least a hundred times
But she’s got it on tonight
He used to wear it on the weekend just running around
Why he forgot he even left it behind
She says it keeps her warm
Oh, but it’s so much more

It makes her feel close
Makes her smile it’s like he’s with her almost
Till the tears take over
She’s still in hell
But she tells herself
She’s ready to let him go
Cause that makes her feel close

Just sayin’ goodbye
Getting on with her life
Maybe give love another try
One more try
One more try

It makes her feel close
Makes her smile it’s like he’s with her almost
Till the tears take over
She’s still in hell
But she tells herself
She’s ready to let him go
Cause that makes her feel close

~Rascal Flatts

***This post brought to you by having heard the news of FOUR engagements this past week. And country songs that make me think. Just a personal post.

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